From Madness to Miracles: The Sacred Act of Relationship

Relationships have a way of undoing us. They can strip away our carefully constructed masks, expose our deepest wounds, and pull us to the brink of despair.

For me, that unraveling came secretly, privately within my own marriage. By day, I was a therapist—guiding others navigating destructive patterns and relational challenges, even working with some couples.

But by night, I lay awake wondering about the impact my own marriage was having on our children. I felt humiliated and utterly helpless not knowing how to make the necessary changes in my own home. I knew the theory. I knew the frameworks. And yet I could not shift the unhealthy dynamics in the most important relationship in my life. It felt like madness.

And yet—we walked (often stumbled) forward.

In 2014, we took our first big leap. We registered for a couples workshop, at the time it felt like it offered more privacy and anonymity than what I saw as the only alternative; couples counselling. I remember leaving our two young kids with their grandparents, hiding behind my professional mask (I was offered continuing education credits afterall, perhaps I was only there for professional growth?), and walking into that big room worried it would expose me but more afraid that it wouldn’t move the needle.

And truthfully, it didn’t fix everything. But it did offer us something invaluable: a step on a long and meandering path to change, it gave us a shared language, a sense of intention, and a few simple tools and practices (some I still use today).

It was the beginning of a long, messy, beautiful and ultimately sacred journey. Over the years, we tried, failed, repaired, stumbled, and got back up. Each regrettable incident forced us to dig deeper, adding new layers of healing.

And still—it wasn’t enough.

In 2018, we reached a breaking point. Peace became a North Star for me. It had to be, for our sanity, for our health. We were either going to find a way to have peace in the home or be prepared to seek peace apart. We separated for six months. Those months were excruciating. I often sat in doubt, wondering how we got it so wrong, aching for the road not traveled, fearing our kids had been the sacrificial lambs of our unchecked wounds. Despair whispered that we wouldn’t sustain any changes we found, but Love and Compassion was louder and it kept calling us forward.

That separation became the crucible. It forced us both to dig deeper than we ever had. We took a plunge into all the world’s top relationship teachings (EFT, Gottman, IFS, consciousness work, spiritual frameworks, EMDR trauma recovery, attachment theory and more). We began to cut to the underbelly—the roots of our attachment wounds, our unconscious patterns. Slowly, painstakingly, we began to rebuild—not from the surface, but from the foundation up.

And a sacred miracle slowly began to unfold.

Today, in 2025, I am happier than ever. I am also in a brand new marriage—to the same man. It isn’t always perfect. But it is healthy and hard earned: equitable, respectful, connected, and fun. Grounded in love and the kind of shared commitment and sacred sense of preciousness that comes from looking over the edge of loss and making a different choice.

I sit now in the growing realization that through grace, perseverance, and relentless practice, we accomplished the most powerful work of our lives: we reclaimed what was ours. We restored what unresolved reactivity and unlearned skills nearly stole from us.

This is the act of sacred relationship.

Relationships can bring the most profound joy life has to offer—or the deepest pain and not all unions are meant to endure. Ultimately our birthright is peace and joy and that needs to be pursued above and beyond togetherness. However, it breaks my heart that too many families break up prior to getting the skills and teachings that could have made the difference. So often the difference comes down to the things we were never taught; pivotal teachings and practical skills that could reorient you and your partner onto a whole new landscape.

And what if the ripple of your healing changed not only your daily life, but also what your kids—and even future generations—carry forward in theirs?

This is why we decided to share our story and why Deeper Cravings created an elevated, seaside sanctuary and transformational retreat/workshop experience for couples looking to deepen an already strong bond, breathe new life into something gone stale or completely rebuild something that feels broken down.

It’s not just communication skills, like the workshop we first attended in 2014. That was valuable—it had its important place in our story, it cracked the door open—but it didn’t reach the root. Nourish™ for couples is different. It offers a carefully distilled immersion, born of lived experience and clinical wisdom, woven from the very best of the best practices and frameworks that saved our marriage. It cuts to the underbelly—the deeper places where transformation truly happens.

We only have a couple of spaces left in our February 2026 retreat. I don’t know who they belong to yet. But I trust the right couples will find their way—just as we did when we made our leap all those years ago. Yes, it’s a leap. But if a path can lead you to a new kind of relationship—one grounded in equity, safety, connection, and renewed intimacy—and ultimately keeps it from ending too soon, isn’t it a path worth pursuing?

Whether you come to one of my retreats or find another pathway; If love was once real between you, and if you are both willing to learn, get curious and self-reflect, your relationship may hold more possibilities than you realize.

May you step into the quiet spaces between you and your partner, may you walk the courageous ground of change and may your relationship become a mirror to the unhealed places within you so that together you can create a sacred container for growth and wellbeing—not perfect, but robust, resilient, and Light filled.

With warmth and hope,
Peggy